How I came out of F&O Addiction and depression to build wealth

Published: March 26, 2025 at 6:00 am

Last Updated on March 26, 2025 at 6:15 am

I’m Rajkumar, a 40-year-old professional who has been part of the hospitality industry since 2006. My investment journey began the same year, sparked by an early encounter with *Rich Dad Poor Dad* during my college days.

Though the book ignited my curiosity, the equity markets truly captured my imagination. I started small, with SIPs of Rs 1,000 per month, steadily increasing my contributions over time. Alongside SIPs, I dabbled in stock picking, often guided by tips from friends rather than any structured strategy. My approach was impulsive—buying randomly, selling quickly for small profits, or holding onto losers until they turned green. Patience was never my strength. Over the years, I invested in several poor-quality companies, many of which went bankrupt, but my journey continued.

About this series: I am grateful to readers for sharing intimate details about their financial lives for the benefit of readers. Some of the previous editions are linked at the bottom of this article. You can also access the full reader story archive.

Opinions published in reader stories need not represent the views of freefincal or its editors. We must appreciate multiple solutions to the money management puzzle and empathise with diverse views. Articles are typically not checked for grammar unless it is necessary to convey the right meaning and preserve the tone and emotions of the writers.

If you would like to contribute to the DIY community in this manner, send your audits to freefincal AT Gmail dot com. If you wish, you can publish them anonymously.

Please note: We welcome such articles from young earners who have just started investing. See, for example, this piece by a 29-year-old: How I track financial goals without worrying about returns. We also have a “mutual fund success stories” series. See, for example, how mutual funds helped me achieve financial independence. Now, back to the reader.

As my career progressed, so did my capacity to invest. I clung to a simple yet powerful belief: if my investments exceeded my expenses, I’d come out ahead. My SIPs remained consistent, even as I kept experimenting with stocks. In 2017, I moved to the Middle East. The unstructured approach persisted until 2020, when the COVID-19 pandemic hit. During the market crash, a friend who had launched his Registered Advisor (RA) services convinced me to join him. It turned out to be a brilliant move. Leveraging the downturn, my portfolio doubled quickly, catapulting me into sudden wealth. But with this windfall came a detour into dangerous territory.

The rapid gains skewed my judgment. I fell in with the wrong crowd at work, who introduced me to Futures and Options (F&O) trading. Initially, I made some quick profits, but the tide soon turned. Between 2022 and 2023, I lost a staggering Rs 1.93 crores. Worse than the financial hit was the mental toll. F&O became an addiction—consuming my thoughts, wrecking my sleep, and derailing my focus at work.

I’d stay up nights tracking US markets and SGX Nifty, haunted by overnight positions. I couldn’t concentrate at work, and I started lying to my family about my financial troubles, hiding the extent of my losses and my obsession. The addiction grew so severe that even on the day my mother passed away, while funeral preparations were underway, I found myself glancing at my mobile, checking trades. I feel deeply ashamed of that moment, but I’m sharing it openly now to show just how destructive this addiction can be.

The constant trading on mobile apps took a toll on my health too. My weight ballooned, my stress levels soared, and I was a shadow of my former self. Though I managed to hold my career together, I spiraled into depression. This was, without doubt, the darkest phase of my life.

In my search for a way out, I stumbled upon the *Freefincal* website. I devoured its articles and watched countless videos by Pattu Sir, which shifted my perspective entirely. I realized my strength lay in value investing, not speculative trading. Determined to rebuild, I immersed myself in learning—studying company valuation, reading extensively, and turning to YouTube for guidance.

Mohit from SOIC’s videos were a revelation, opening my eyes to the power of buying quality companies below their intrinsic value. Over the next two and a half years, I made bold yet calculated moves in the stock market. By God’s grace, my aggressive stock picks paid off spectacularly, helping me recover all my losses.

Around this time, I connected with Mr. Sriram Jayram, a fee-only financial advisor recommended by Freefincal. His guidance was transformative. He introduced me to goal-based investing and restructured my portfolio, bringing my equity exposure down to 60% and allocating 40% to debt. From Pattu Sir, I also learned the concept of index investing, which brought me a sense of peace I hadn’t felt in years. This balanced approach gave me stability and clarity. Looking back, one constant anchored me through the chaos: my SIPs, which I have never stopped since 2006. They proved to be my financial lifeline.

Today, I stand with a corpus of Rs 7 crores, split between equity and debt, and completely debt-free. All I do now is invest in a few good stocks and index funds—a simple, disciplined strategy that keeps me grounded. I share this story to warn others about the destructive lure of F&O trading—a weapon of mass destruction for wealth, health, and well-being.

My journey taught me invaluable lessons: delayed gratification is a superpower, and the bliss of long-term compounding is unmatched. Currently, I’m working in the Middle East, with 20 years of my career still ahead. I plan to slow down at 50 and retire by 52, taking life one steady step at a time. By coming clean about my struggles, I hope to inspire others to break free from such addictions and find peace in sensible, long-term investing.

With Gratitude to Pattu Sir, Rajkumar.

Reader stories published earlier:

As regular readers may know, we publish a personal financial audit each December – this is the 2023 edition: Portfolio Audit 2023: The Annual Review of My Goal-Based Investments. We asked regular readers to share how they review their investments and track financial goals.

These published audits have had a compounding effect on readers. If you would like to contribute to the DIY community in this manner, send your audits to freefincal AT Gmail. They could be published anonymously if you so desire.

Do share this article with your friends using the buttons below.

🔥Enjoy massive discounts on our courses, robo-advisory tool and exclusive investor circle! 🔥& join our community of 7000+ users!
Use our Robo-advisory Tool for a start-to-finish financial plan! More than 2,500 investors and advisors use this!
Track your mutual funds and stock investments with this Google Sheet!
We also publish monthly equity mutual funds, debt and hybrid mutual funds, index funds and ETF screeners and momentum, low-volatility stock screeners.
Follow Freefincal on Google News
Follow Freefincal on Google News
Subscribe to the freefincal Youtube Channel. Subscribe button courtesy: Vecteezy.
Subscribe to the freefincal Youtube Channel.
Follow freefincal on WhatsApp Channel
Follow freefincal on WhatsApp
Podcast: Let's Get RICH With PATTU! Every single Indian CAN grow their wealth! 
Listen to the Lets Get Rich with Pattu Podcast
Listen to the Let's Get Rich with Pattu Podcast
You can watch podcast episodes on the OfSpin Media Friends YouTube Channel.
Lets Get RICH With PATTU podcast on YouTube
Let's Get RICH With PATTU podcast on YouTube.
🔥Now Watch Let's Get Rich With Pattu தமிழில் (in Tamil)! 🔥
  • Do you have a comment about the above article? Reach out to us on Twitter: @freefincal or @pattufreefincal
  • Have a question? Subscribe to our newsletter using the form below.
  • Hit 'reply' to any email from us! We do not offer personalized investment advice. We can write a detailed article without mentioning your name if you have a generic question.

Join 32,000+ readers and get free money management solutions delivered to your inbox! Subscribe to get posts via email! (Link takes you to our email sign-up form)


About The Author

Pattabiraman editor freefincalDr M. Pattabiraman(PhD) is the founder, managing editor and primary author of freefincal. He is an associate professor at the Indian Institute of Technology, Madras. He has over ten years of experience publishing news analysis, research and financial product development. Connect with him via Twitter(X), Linkedin, or YouTube. Pattabiraman has co-authored three print books: (1) You can be rich too with goal-based investing (CNBC TV18) for DIY investors. (2) Gamechanger for young earners. (3) Chinchu Gets a Superpower! for kids. He has also written seven other free e-books on various money management topics. He is a patron and co-founder of “Fee-only India,” an organisation promoting unbiased, commission-free investment advice.
Our flagship course! Learn to manage your portfolio like a pro to achieve your goals regardless of market conditions! More than 3,000 investors and advisors are part of our exclusive community! Get clarity on how to plan for your goals and achieve the necessary corpus no matter the market condition is!! Watch the first lecture for free!  One-time payment! No recurring fees! Life-long access to videos! Reduce fear, uncertainty and doubt while investing! Learn how to plan for your goals before and after retirement with confidence.
Our new course!  Increase your income by getting people to pay for your skills! More than 700 salaried employees, entrepreneurs and financial advisors are part of our exclusive community! Learn how to get people to pay for your skills! Whether you are a professional or small business owner who wants more clients via online visibility or a salaried person wanting a side income or passive income, we will show you how to achieve this by showcasing your skills and building a community that trusts and pays you! (watch 1st lecture for free). One-time payment! No recurring fees! Life-long access to videos!   
Our new book for kids: “Chinchu Gets a Superpower!” is now available!
Both boy and girl version covers of Chinchu gets a superpower
Both the boy and girl-version covers of "Chinchu Gets a superpower".
Most investor problems can be traced to a lack of informed decision-making. We made bad decisions and money mistakes when we started earning and spent years undoing these mistakes. Why should our children go through the same pain? What is this book about? As parents, what would it be if we had to groom one ability in our children that is key not only to money management and investing but to any aspect of life? My answer: Sound Decision Making. So, in this book, we meet Chinchu, who is about to turn 10. What he wants for his birthday and how his parents plan for it, as well as teaching him several key ideas of decision-making and money management, is the narrative. What readers say!
Feedback from a young reader after reading Chinchu gets a Superpower (small version)
Feedback from a young reader after reading Chinchu gets a Superpower!
Must-read book even for adults! This is something that every parent should teach their kids right from their young age. The importance of money management and decision making based on their wants and needs. Very nicely written in simple terms. - Arun.
Buy the book: Chinchu gets a superpower for your child!
How to profit from content writing: Our new ebook is for those interested in getting side income via content writing. It is available at a 50% discount for Rs. 500 only!
Do you want to check if the market is overvalued or undervalued? Use our market valuation tool (it will work with any index!), or get the Tactical Buy/Sell timing tool!
We publish monthly mutual fund screeners and momentum, low-volatility stock screeners.
About freefincal & its content policy. Freefincal is a News Media Organization dedicated to providing original analysis, reports, reviews and insights on mutual funds, stocks, investing, retirement and personal finance developments. We do so without conflict of interest and bias. Follow us on Google News. Freefincal serves more than three million readers a year (5 million page views) with articles based only on factual information and detailed analysis by its authors. All statements made will be verified with credible and knowledgeable sources before publication. Freefincal does not publish paid articles, promotions, PR, satire or opinions without data. All opinions will be inferences backed by verifiable, reproducible evidence/data. Contact information: letters {at} freefincal {dot} com (sponsored posts or paid collaborations will not be entertained)
Connect with us on social media
Our publications

You Can Be Rich Too with Goal-Based Investing

You can be rich too with goal based investingPublished by CNBC TV18, this book is meant to help you ask the right questions and seek the correct answers, and since it comes with nine online calculators, you can also create custom solutions for your lifestyle! Get it now.
Gamechanger: Forget Startups, Join Corporate & Still Live the Rich Life You Want Gamechanger: Forget Start-ups, Join Corporate and Still Live the Rich Life you wantThis book is meant for young earners to get their basics right from day one! It will also help you travel to exotic places at a low cost! Get it or gift it to a young earner.

Your Ultimate Guide to Travel

Travel-Training-Kit-Cover-new This is an in-depth dive into vacation planning, finding cheap flights, budget accommodation, what to do when travelling, and how travelling slowly is better financially and psychologically, with links to the web pages and hand-holding at every step. Get the pdf for Rs 300 (instant download)